


I Guess It Must Be Wanderlust or Tryin' to Get Free

by frapandfurious



Series: I Will Share Your Road [1]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst with a Happy Ending, Attempt at Humor, Attempted Kidnapping, Bonding, Brendol Hux's A+ Parenting, Crying, Developing Relationship, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fast burn?, Feelings, Fluff and Angst, Hostage Situations, Hurt/Comfort, In A Very Short Time Span, Light Angst, M/M, Road Trips, attempted ransom, is that a thing?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-17
Updated: 2017-09-17
Packaged: 2018-12-30 15:49:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12112053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frapandfurious/pseuds/frapandfurious
Summary: Even if they hadn’t spent the first hour of their acquaintance with Hux unconscious in the backseat of Kylo’s car, even if Kylo hadn’t quite possibly ruined Hux’s relationship with his father and maybe his life, he was sure Hux would never go for someone like him. Hux was well-to-do and educated and Kylo was a dropout with anger issues who thought ransom was a good way to make some quick money.Oh well. Kylo smiled at him and set down the cans of soda. He held up his snack selection.“Fritos, pretzels, or potato chips,” he announced.- - -Desperate for money, Kylo kidnaps a wealthy businessman's only son for ransom. But when the man refuses to pay up, Kylo is left with a devastated Hux who would rather be ditched at the side of the road than return home.  And Kylo simply can't do that, so instead, they drive away into the night together.





	I Guess It Must Be Wanderlust or Tryin' to Get Free

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Glass_Oceans](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glass_Oceans/gifts).



> This fic is all [glass_oceans](https://glass-oceans.tumblr.com/) fault. I don't even remember the original conversation but it somehow led to this. It felt really good to write something independent of any WIPs/deadlines. :)
> 
> WARNINGS: This fic begins with one main character knocking out, restraining and kidnapping another for ransom. It's done rather clumsily and there is no physical abuse, and absolutely no dubcon, noncon etc. However, if the kidnapping situation might bother you, please feel free to turn back now.
> 
> (Also if anyone thinks of any other tags I should add, please let me know!)
> 
> Title from [Carefree Highway](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewhM7I9gD4U) by Gordon Lightfoot
> 
> Also here's a [playlist](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLR9kWELFoJELYJRzrwPziFDD8QDvtdQxM) I made for this and might add to.

_This is going to work_ , Kylo reassured himself for the umpteenth time, _and if it doesn’t, you ditch him and run._

It was late afternoon. Kylo lingered in the alley between a university building and the yoga studio beside it. At one end was the sidewalk in front of the buildings. At the other was the back lot where he’d parked his car.

He shifted impatiently and ran a hand back through his hair. He glanced at his watch again. Any minute now. Good. He wanted to get this over with; the alley smelled like garbage.

Not for the first time, he found himself questioning whether this was a good idea.

Well. It was a terrible idea. But he was desperate, and he’d planned it out, and he was already on the run from home, so if this didn’t work, nothing changed.

Unless he got caught. Not getting caught was the main objective.

The problem: He’d gotten angry. _Very_ angry. His family tended to bring out that in him, but this time it was different, worse. He’d sort of…set fire to his uncle’s fitness center.

In his defense, he didn’t know that a class had been rescheduled for that night, that there were people in the building. No one was hurt, but there were tens of thousands of dollars’ worth of damage, not to mention a dozen shaken students.

And somehow, Uncle Luke had just known it was him. He’d threatened to press charges but Kylo’s mother talked him out of it. Instead, she suggested, he could pay for the repairs.

Kylo had stood there facing them: his mother, his father, his uncle. The combination of anger and fear and most of all _disappointment_ on their faces had been too much.

None of them even asked what had happened. None of them asked _why_. They didn’t care.

So Kylo ran.

At six on a cool, foggy morning, he fit what he could into a duffel bag, emptied his savings account, and driven his old hand-me-down car out of town. No plan, no destination. Just the primal urge to escape.

Now, at least, he had a plan. A way to quickly get the money he needed, send it to his family to keep them from pursuing him. What he’d do after that was still up in the air. One thing at a time.

Finally five o’clock hit and students and teachers trickled from the building. None of them the one he needed; for that, he would have to wait a little longer. He’d spent some time observing his target and he knew he was nothing if not an overachiever, staying after late to chat with his professor. He would be at least another five minutes.

So Kylo waited.

 

And then, there he was. A tall, skinny ginger in black pants and a blue button-up, stopping on the front step to check his phone, a black leather messenger back slung across his shoulder and settled on one narrow hip.

Armitage Hux. A first year grad student at the university, and more importantly, the son of a wealthy businessman. He was an only child, and had no friends that Kylo could tell, no one to walk home with or check up on him. Exactly what Kylo needed.

Hux sighed and tucked his phone into his pocket, hopping down the last step and turning right to walk the same way he did every weekday afternoon.

As he passed the alley, Kylo piped up, “hey, you got a minute?”

Hux stopped abruptly and shot him an irritated but curious look. “For what, may I ask?”

“My phone’s busted, I need to call for a ride home. Can I use yours?”

He shot the other man his most sheepish grin. It didn’t quite work; Hux’s frown only deepened. But he wasn’t leaving yet.

Finally he heaved another sigh and turned towards Kylo.

“I suppose. But be quick.”

He took a step into the alley, then another. Another. With one hand he reached into his back pocket to pull his phone out. Kylo took a step closer. He, too, reached into his pocket.

In one swift motion he’d pressed the damp dishrag to Hux’s mouth. A surprised, muffled yelp made its way out of Hux’s mouth. He struggled, but Kylo was stronger, keeping an arm around Hux’s arms and torso.

Soon his eyelids drooped and his body began to go slack. Kylo kept his arm around him to catch him as he crumpled. The phone clattered to the ground. He snatched it up and shoved it into his pocket; it wouldn’t do to leave anything behind.

Then he hoisted Hux over one shoulder and crept as silent as a shadow to his waiting car.

Some zip ties, some duct tape, and Hux was securely tucked into the back seat. He’d padded it down with some blankets and then draped another over him to hide him from prying eyes. He told himself it was so that he could get rid of them and with them any trace of DNA, but it also helped assuage his guilty conscience if he kept his captive at least moderately comfortable.

And then he drove and drove.

He drove for an hour before he heard the rustle of fabric and a soft groan from the back. He peeked up at the rearview mirror to watch the blanket shift as Hux slowly woke.

Kylo pulled off to the side, gravel crunching under the wheels. They were in the middle of nowhere, miles from the nearest town. Empty fields bordered them on either side, not a soul in sight.

Kylo turned off the car and walked around to open the back door. Hux raised his head slowly at the sound, the blanket slipping from his face, allowing him to groggily appraise the situation. He tried to lift his head a little more and then groaned again and pressed his face back down into the blankets.

To be safe, Kylo had read up on the chemical mixture he used and knew that Hux would be feeling dizzy, maybe a little nauseous. He’d probably have a headache. But there would be no long term effects, Kylo had made certain of that.

Still. Watching him grit his teeth and attempt to lift himself up again, pushing through whatever he was feeling, made Kylo feel a strange mix of guilt and admiration.

He pulled the blanket off of Hux, and the man gasped. Hux began to look over his shoulder to see who was there but Kylo was already taking him by his arms, bound behind his back, and pulling him out of the car, careful not to hit his head on the doorframe.

Kylo turned him around so he could sit at the edge of the back seat, his duct-taped legs jutting out of the doorway. As Hux looked around dazedly, Kylo took a moment to actually look at him up close for the first time.

He had freckles, Kylo realized, like sprinkles across his fair skin, and bright green-blue eyes framed by slowly blinking soft golden lashes. The curves of his jaw and soft lips contrasted in a striking way with the high cut of his cheekbones and the lean lines of his figure. His copper hair had been neatly parted and styled earlier; now it was a tousled mess falling across his brow.

He was…kind of gorgeous.

 _Not now_.

Kylo shook his head and crouched in front of Hux. He was holding Hux’s phone.

“Hey. You with me?” It came out more gently than he intended.

“I…huh?” Hux tossed his head to one side to move his hair out of his face. When it didn’t work, he tried to raise one hand to fix it, and that’s when he noticed he was bound. He squirmed a little, his arms first and then his legs, panic beginning to spread on his face.

Then his eyes landed on Kylo and it didn’t seem possible for them to be so piercing when he was still half-dazed.

“Who the _fuck_ are you?” Hux slurred. “And where am I?”

“You don’t need to worry about that. All you need to do is help me make a call.”

He tried to sound impassive, intimidating. It was difficult with those eyes burning into him like a blazing sun.

Hux swung his taped legs up in an attempt to kick at Kylo. It only succeeded in throwing him off balance and Kylo had to dart forward and catch him by the front of his shirt before he tipped back into the car.  
  
“Come on, stop that.”

Hux tried to shake himself loose of Kylo’s grip and Kylo obligingly released him, moving back to crouch again, slightly out of kicking range, just in case.

“What do you want?” Hux hissed. Then his eyes widened. “Are. Are you going to…”

Kylo stared at him.

“To…what?” And stared some more. And then… “Oh. _No!_ No fucking way!”

Hux sneered. “Well you don’t have to put it like _that_.”

Kylo gaped at him. “You’re offended that I don’t want to fuck y – no, nevermind, listen, I’m not going to hurt you, I’m certainly not going to _do that_. This can be quick and easy. I just need some money.”

“My wallet is in my back pocket, but if you touch my ass I swear to god I’ll…”

“I’m not – no that’s – okay no one is touching anyone’s ass. I don’t want _your_ money.” He paused. “Unless you happen to be carrying around twenty grand.”

Silence.

“I’m _kidding_ ,” Kylo clarified. “Trying to lighten the mood?”

“You duct taped my legs together,” Hux snapped, “I’m pretty sure there is no lightening the mood.”

“Look, okay. I’m going to make a call.” Kylo held up the phone.

“That’s mine!”

“Yes. I’m going to call your father and he’s going to give me twenty-thousand dollars and I’m going to give him _you_ back, and we all go our separate ways.”

Hux was silent but his stare spoke volumes. Finally Kylo couldn’t take it.

“ _What_?”

“You know what year this is, right?”

“…yes?”

“Holding me for ransom? _Really_? Did you also send him a letter made out of newspaper clippings?”

“You’re in no position to be questioning my methods.”

“And you do know what my father is worth, right?” Hux continued as though he hadn’t heard him. “Aiming a little low with the twenty-thousand, don’t you think?”

“That’s all I need!” Kylo barked. “Just – just that! To fix something. It might not seem like much to you, but…” he trailed off and swallowed tightly. “So just cooperate and let’s get this over with!”

Hux stayed silent through the outburst, looking over Kylo appraisingly. It felt like being under a microscope. Kylo ducked his head, oddly self-conscious, which was fucking ridiculous when he was the one in control here.

He swiped open the phone and scrolled through Hux’s contacts. There weren’t many and it barely took a second to find _Father_ among them. There were two numbers, a work one and a cell. Kylo’s thumb hovered over them for a moment before pressing the cell number.

“He’ll be pissed if you interrupt something important,” Hux muttered.

“I think he’ll find it worth his time,” Kylo countered.

Hux didn’t have a snappy comeback for that.

Kylo hit the call button and put the phone on speaker.

It rang two, three, four times and Kylo tried to calm his growing panic by reminding himself there was still the work number. It was too early to be in bed and hopefully late enough that he wouldn’t still be at work.

On the fifth ring, someone picked up.

“ _What?_ ” snapped a gruff voice on the other end. The evening news was on in the background.

Kylo frowned at the greeting. The elder Hux did think this was _his son_ calling, right?

“Hello, Mr. Hux.” Kylo dropped his voice a pitch lower than usual. Hux raised an eyebrow at him and Kylo shot him a dirty look.

There was a long pause at the other end.

“ _Armitage? Is this some sort of childish prank? Because you know_ – “

“It isn’t,” Kylo interrupted. “And this isn’t Armitage. He’s here, but he won’t talk to you unless I say he can.”

Both of Hux’s eyebrows shot up at that. He opened his mouth as if threatening to speak; Kylo shot him a _don’t you dare_ look and, to his surprise, Hux slowly shut his mouth, an amused smirk playing on his lips.

“ _What’s going on here? Who are you?_ ”

“Doesn’t matter. I have your son. If you want him back, you’ll do exactly as I say.”

And the man on the other end of the line _laughed_.

“ _This is a joke, right? One of those stupid prank shows? How did you get that phone anyway?_ ”

Kylo exhaled slowly through his nose. He should have known this wouldn’t be so easy.

“Here,” he said, “he’s right here.” He held the phone up for Hux to speak into.

And of course Hux stayed obstinately silent.

“Do you want to go home or not?” Kylo whispered through gritted teeth. “Don’t you have…homework or something?”

Hux held his gaze a moment longer and then rolled his eyes.

“It’s me, sir. Unfortunately this _isn’t_ a joke. This man is very serious.”

Kylo’s brow furrowed. Who the hell called their own dad _sir_?

“ _You’re in on this, Armitage?”_

“Not by choice, I can assure you.”

“ _Well stop it, this instant, or I swear…_ ”

“I can’t,” Hux said sharply. Fear flashed across his face almost immediately. He spoke again more calmly. “I can’t, sir. I’m tied up, I don’t know where we are and I don’t know whether he’s armed. He knocked me out with something. Imbecile didn’t bother to hide his face, though…”

 _Shit, shit, shit._ He knew he’d forgotten something.

“Twenty-thousand dollars,” Kylo interrupted. “That’s all I want for his safe return. You won’t even notice it’s gone. We can negotiate the exchange. You involve the cops and I’ll involve the press, and that won’t be good for business, will it?” When there wasn’t an immediate answer he added, more forcefully, “ _well?_ Do we have a deal?”

“ _No._ ”

The smirk dropped from Hux’s face.

“ _No_?” Kylo echoed. “This isn’t a joke, Mr. Hux, I – “

“ _I know it’s not. And my answer is no. I won’t negotiate with you. I won’t give you one penny. Armitage is a grown man, he can sort out his own messes._ ”

“Do you understand that he’s in real danger? I could do anything. They could find his body weighted down at the bottom of a river somewhere. What then?” Kylo flinched. That was a little much, but he was getting desperate.

“ _Deal with this, Armitage_. _Don’t disappoint me._ ”

Hux was growing paler by the minute.

“Take it off speaker,” he whispered to Kylo. “Let me talk to him.”

Not really seeing another option at that point, Kylo did as Hux asked and held the phone to his ear.

“It’s just me now, d- sir. You can tell me what’s really going on.”

Kylo frowned and leaned close to try to hear the other end of the call. He could only make out bits and pieces.

“What do you mean?” Hux continued. He looked like he was going to be sick. He kept stopping and starting as he was interrupted. “So you won’t – I know you have it – but are you at least going to call the police – “

Kylo could hear the voice on the other end growing increasingly irritated. _I hate my dad_ , he thought _, but man, even he isn’t this big of a dick_.

“You’re…you’re serious…”

Hux’s father muttered something that Kylo didn’t catch. Then the phone made a little _blip_ noise and the call ended.

Kylo lowered the phone slowly. He fumbled around to stick it into a pocket, too focused on Hux’s expression as it warred between remaining calm and despairing. Finally it settled into a distant blankness, gazing off somewhere just behind Kylo’s shoulder.

Silence fell heavily over them.

Kylo sat back on his heels and chewed on his lip. This was okay, right? He wouldn’t get the money, but it sounded like he wouldn’t be caught, either. He’d just drop Hux off somewhere where he could catch a ride home and then drive off. It’d be like nothing ever happened.

Except…

If he dropped Hux off somewhere, would he make it home alright? If he didn’t, would his father suspect the worst and send the police after all?

But the bigger question on his mind was: did Hux even _want_ to go home?

The sun hung low in the sky, casting golden light around them, the beginnings of a warmly colored early-September sunset that still always reminded Kylo of having to return to school.

Kylo cleared his throat. “Do you, uh. Have someone who you can call for a ride?”

Hux didn’t answer. Kylo was about to ask again when he finally he gave an almost imperceptible little shake of his head.

“Okay. Okay, um. Do you have money for a cab?”

Another pause. A nod.

Kylo nodded too. The next question sat uncomfortably on the tip of his tongue. He didn’t want to ask. He didn’t want to know. But he didn’t think he’d be able to live with himself if he didn’t ask.

He almost laughed. He could, apparently, live with holding someone for ransom, but not with sending him back to his shitty father.

“Do you want to go home?”

A pause so long that Kylo began to wonder if he’d even heard him. And then, soft and hoarse,

“No.”

Kylo’s heart dropped into his stomach.

_Now what?_

It was getting late. Hux was beginning to shiver. Or had he been shaking this whole time?

Kylo wondered why he didn’t just pull one of the blankets around himself when he realized that Hux was still bound. It must have been beyond uncomfortable now. His chest flooded with guilt.

“Here, let me…let me get you out of these.” He undid the tape around Hux’s ankles and knees and let him stretch his legs out. He pulled his father’s old pocket knife out of the inside pocket in his jacket and leaned around Hux to cut the zip tie holding his wrists together.

As the zip tie fell open, Kylo flinched. There were angry red lines on either side of Hux’s wrists. Not quite cuts, but painful-looking all the same. He guided Hux’s arms around to his front, flinching again at the little intake of breath he made at the movement in his stiff muscles.

Kylo leaned back again and half expected Hux to lash out. At this point, he probably would have let him.

But Hux just sat there, hands in his lap. He didn’t even bother stretching out his arms, which must have ached. So Kylo did it for him, lifting one at a time and bending and unbending each one at the elbow, rubbing feeling back into his hands and forearms. Hux didn’t move or say a word.

“Okay,” Kylo said again, just for something to say. He took a deep breath. It was getting dark. He had to think fast. He had to do _something_.

He looked at Hux’s face again. He was practically comatose, his empty stare still lingering on nothing.

For the last time, the thought of leaving him somewhere crossed Kylo’s mind. He tossed it out immediately. He couldn’t do that. The moment Hux was ready, Kylo would make sure he knew he was more than free to go, but until then…

Until then, someone had to take care of him. And the only someone around was Kylo, who was the whole reason Hux was here in the first place.

He’d done this. He felt like a fucking monster. He pictured the fearful, disappointed faces of his family, and he finally understood. He finally couldn’t blame them.

Kylo stood and lifted one of the blankets from the back seat. He draped it around Hux’s shoulders and gently tugged on the corners until Hux rose to his feet. Kylo shut the back door and opened the passenger side and coaxed Hux into it.

He thought Hux would at least, out of habit, buckle himself in, but when he just sat there, Kylo leaned in and did that for him, too.

Then he drove, with no destination in mind other than _away_.

☾

The sun slid lower and lower until it was just a thin line of gold on the horizon, and then it was dark, the sky cloudless. Hux curled up in the seat and leaned his head against the window.

They drove past stretches of empty land, past farms, through little clustered strips of gas stations and restaurants. Their brightly lit signs made highlights and shadows dance across Hux’s face, emphasizing the hollows of his cheeks and eyes. Like a body in early stages of decay. Then the lights were behind them and there was only the artificial yellow glow of street lamps, reflecting off of Hux’s glassy eyes.

It was too quiet. Kylo turned the radio on, keeping the volume low. He fiddled with the knob, each station half-static, until he came across a rock station that was relatively clear. “Runaway Train” was playing.

 _I'm in too deep_  
_There's no way out_  
_This time I have really led myself astray_

__

He sighed. How fucking appropriate.

__

Kylo ran hot, and it wasn’t quite the crisp cool of autumn yet, but he turned the heat up a little in case Hux was cold and soon the car was toasty-warm.

__

It was almost nine by the time Kylo’s stomach began to grumble. When was the last time he’d eaten? Breakfast. Then he’d been too nervous to have lunch. It felt like ages ago, not just that morning.

__

When had _Hux_ last eaten? Kylo hadn’t brought any snacks. He didn’t think he’d have his…captive, or whatever, long enough for that to be necessary.

__

Like a gift from the heavens, the neon sign of a roadside restaurant came into view. _Debbie’s Diner_ , it read, and then, most importantly _, Open 24 Hours_. Most of the other stores and restaurants around it were closed, but a little further up the road Kylo was pretty sure he saw an open gas station.

__

He pulled in to the parking lot. There were only two other cars and a flatbed.

__

“Come on. We’re getting dinner.”

__

It took worryingly little effort to get Hux to un-cocoon himself from the blanket and follow Kylo into the restaurant. He seemed to be moving on autopilot. Kylo hoped that meant he’d eat, too.

__

The white lights inside were harsh after miles and miles of dark roads. Kylo squinted and blinked. The waitress was pouring coffee for a middle-aged man sitting on a stool, probably the truck driver. She smiled warmly and told them to pick a seat, she’d be with them in a moment.

__

Kylo guided Hux into a booth and set a menu in front of him. Hux stared at it a moment before turning to look outside.

__

For some reason it was then that Kylo remembered he still had Hux’s phone.

__

“Here,” he said, pulling it out of his pocket and setting it in front of him. “Forgot to give you this back.”

__

Kylo wanted to make sure he knew he was free to go whenever he chose. Maybe there was still someone Hux could call. At the very least maybe having his phone back would offer some comfort.

__

Hux didn’t even glance at the screen. But he did take it and put it in his pocket. That was something.

__

The waitress came by and greeted them cheerfully, with an extra sympathetic glance to Hux.

__

“Well, I can tell which one of you was napping on the drive,” she joked good-naturedly.

__

Hux didn’t answer, and when she asked what they’d like, he didn’t even seem keen on ordering for himself, so Kylo got them both waters and then ordered a stack of pancakes and a cheeseburger with fries.

__

The food came out quickly, and the pancakes looked undoubtedly better than the burger, so Kylo slid it in front of Hux along with some silverware and the little pitcher of syrup. He took big ravenous bites of his burger and kept his eyes on Hux. Hux sipped at the water but didn’t touch the food.

__

“At least _try_ ,” Kylo pleaded. “You’ve got to be hungry by now. You can have some of my fries. Do you like milkshakes? They have milkshakes.”

__

He felt like he was trying to talk a child into eating their dinner.

__

Very slowly, Hux took the knife and fork and began cutting the pancakes. He seemed to be obliging mostly to shut Kylo up, but Kylo would take it. He watched as Hux took a few bites, not even bothering with the syrup.

__

On the way out, the waitress offered them the last cherry pie in the case, on the house.

__

“If you don’t take it, I will, and these thighs don’t need any more pies,” she insisted. Kylo smiled awkwardly and accepted the plastic bag from her.

__

☾

__

Kylo drove and drove. He kept his eyes out for a hotel. If it was just him, he’d stop anywhere and sleep in the car, but now he had Hux.

__

The radio station grew choppy and after some fiddling, Kylo gave up trying to find another one. But the silence was unbearable, so he began to talk.

__

For some reason, the first thing he thought to talk about was the time in his sophomore year of high school when he and his friends had snuck into an abandoned shopping center and been caught shooting paintball guns at the walls.

__

That led into another story of his stupid teenage antics, and another, and another. Most of them involved Kylo’s rowdy group of friends, who his parents thought were a bad influence. They didn’t know that more often than not Kylo himself was the ringleader.

__

It was the story about how he dove into the lake in the middle of December on nothing but a dare that somehow broke the spell.

__

Kylo was explaining how he had rubbed Crisco all over himself because one of his friends had told him it would insulate him, when he heard a little snort from the passenger seat. He shut his mouth so quickly he bit the edge of his tongue.

__

“Fucking hell,” Hux muttered. “It’s a miracle you lived this long.”

__

Kylo stared at him until he felt the car beginning to drift into the other lane. He quickly straightened it out and pulled his eyes back to the road. He kept tossing little glances to Hux, who was still staring out the window, but looked less like he’d just received a death sentence.

__

It made no sense, the immense relief he felt. Now that he’d gotten a foot in the door, he refused to let it shut again.

__

“That’s not even the worst part,” Kylo continued eagerly, “they told me clothes would weigh me down, so I jumped in stark fucking naked.”

__

Hux gave a breathless almost-laugh. “Please don’t tell me they stole your clothes.”

__

“Of course they did.”

__

They hit some curves in the road and Kylo had to look where he was going, but he could feel Hux’s eyes on him.

__

“What did you do?”

__

“I ran to the nearest shop. It was for people who camp by the lake, fishing gear and fire pokers and rustic gift shop shit. I, uh. Took the bearskin rug off the wall and walked home in that.”

__

“You did not.”

__

“I swear I did! I gave it back later, the thing was creepy, but it was warm.”

__

“You’re an idiot.” It was stated bluntly, but with a hint of amusement.

__

“Yeah,” he agreed with a shrug and a grin. Maybe he was just tired, maybe it was the light, but he swore he caught Hux’s mouth curve up before he had to look back at the road.

__

Finally he spotted a motel. It didn’t look particularly nice, but it wasn’t particularly shady either. It would do.

__

“We only have single bed rooms left,” the man at the desk said, his eyes flicking between them.

__

Kylo didn’t really want to pay for separate rooms, but…

__

He looked at Hux. “Do you want your own?” he asked quietly. Hux only shrugged. Without the stories to keep him distracted, he was slipping away again. He looked exhausted.

__

“Just one, please,” Kylo said, turning back to the man and pulling out his wallet. He could sleep on the floor for a night, let Hux have the bed. It would be fine. It was just one night. He was too tired to wonder what the morning would bring.

__

Their room smelled like orange-scented carpet cleaner. The painting above the bed was crooked and the chair in the corner was probably older than they were.

__

That aside, it was clean and quiet. The bed was bigger than Kylo expected, and they even had a little kitchenette with a coffee machine and mini-fridge.

__

Kylo dropped his duffel bag onto the chair while Hux lingered awkwardly by the bed.

__

“You should get some rest,” Kylo said carefully. He didn’t add _you’ve had a rough day_. Some things went without saying.

__

Hux looked down at his now-rumpled blue button-up and black slacks.

__

Of course. He didn’t have anything. No clothes, no toiletries, not even his phone charger.

__

“You can borrow something of mine,” Kylo blurted quickly. “Here, uh…” he pulled out a worn old t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants. “Here.” He tossed them onto the bed. “You could take a shower, too. If there’s no, um, complimentary stuff in there, I have that 2-in-1 shampoo body wash stuff.” He pulled the bottle out and added that on top of the pile of clothes.

__

Hux’s lips twitched up a little. He gathered the things into his arms. Just then, his stomach growled. He glanced down at it in mild confusion as if eating had just crossed his mind for the first time that day. Maybe it had.

__

“We have the pie,” Kylo reminded him. “I put it in the fridge. And, um, I’ll go see if they have vending machines.”

__

Hux nodded and disappeared into the bathroom. Kylo took their key and a pocketful of change and made his way outside.

__

He returned a little later, after a long and brutal fight with the soda machine that had ended when the man at the desk came outside to see what the banging sound was. He opened the machine up for Kylo and gave him whatever he wanted if he would _please just not break the machine_.

__

So he had one arm piled with a few bags of chips and two cans of diet Coke. As he fumbled with the lock, he half expected to open the door and find Hux gone. But there he was, seated on one side of the bed with the open container of pie settled across his outstretched legs. He was taking big bites of it with the plastic fork the waitress had included; it was already half gone. The TV was on, some late night talk show, filling the room with a blue glow.

__

Kylo’s t-shirt was big on Hux, slipping off of one pale shoulder. The sweatpants were big, too, and Hux had had to tie the drawstring as tight as it would go around his narrow waist. When he looked up at Kylo as he entered, he had a spot of pie filling on his upper lip. He quickly swiped at it with his tongue.

__

Kylo couldn’t take his eyes off him. His heart was beating faster, suddenly, and he could feel a flush creeping onto his cheeks.

__

_Oh no_ , he thought. _He’s cute_. It crept into his mind as easily as _gorgeous_ had earlier. And he firmly ignored it like he had before.

__

Even if they hadn’t spent the first hour of their acquaintance with Hux unconscious in the backseat of Kylo’s car, even if Kylo hadn’t quite possibly ruined Hux’s relationship with his father and maybe his life, he was sure Hux would never go for someone like him. Hux was well-to-do and educated and Kylo was a dropout with anger issues who thought ransom was a good way to make some quick money.

__

Oh well. Kylo smiled at him and set down the cans of soda. He held up his snack selection.

__

“Fritos, pretzels, or potato chips,” he announced.

__

Hux swallowed a massive piece of pie. “I can’t remember the last time I had chips. Or pie, for that matter.”

__

Kylo handed over the potato chips and the pretzels, keeping the Fritos for himself. “Really?”

__

“My stepmother is a health nut. She wouldn’t let anything like this in the house. So I never really developed a taste for it.”

__

Kylo hummed and dropped into the chair in the corner. He tried to focus on the TV, but his mind was busy catching up with everything that had happened that day. Every time he began to feel overwhelmed, he glanced over at Hux eating one potato chip at a time and felt calm wash over him.

__

He’d make his first order of business helping Hux get wherever he needed to go. Even if it was back home. He would clean up this mess. Everything else could wait.

__

The room was cold. Kylo got up to fiddle with the temperature then settled back into the chair, which he barely fit into and creaked under his weight.

__

Hux’s eyes followed him. He set aside the empty pie container and the bag of chips and shifted around on the bed for a moment, pulling the tucked blanket and sheet out from underneath himself. He folded them down and silently patted the spot on the bed beside him.

__

Kylo hesitated. Sticking his cold feet under the warm blankets was tempting, but…

__

“Are you sure?”

__

“Why not? There’s room.”

__

“You aren’t…scared?”

__

“Of _you?_ ”

__

Kylo frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

__

“Just sit down already.”

__

“Fine. I’m going to change first, though.”

__

Kylo popped into the bathroom and came back out in a t-shirt and basketball shorts. As he crossed the room to the other side of the bed, Hux’s eyes lingered on him, flickering over his shoulders and chest. When Kylo sat, he looked away, back to the TV.

__

Kylo cringed at the creak of the mattress as he got comfortable on the bed. He always felt like a giant next to others, and Hux was no exception. While he was nearly as tall as Kylo, he was slender, and his features were subtle, no oversized hands or nose or ears.

__

Kylo looked like the sort who’d just as soon crush you as look at you. He looked like he got into fights in back alleys. A scar across his face would probably not be out of place.

__

He wasn’t any of those things, really. Looking intimidating worked in his favor, but mostly he just wanted to be left alone. It wasn’t that he didn’t play well with others so much as he didn’t fit in with others, except maybe the “bad influences” he’d hung around with in school. They were all gone now. They’d moved on to better things while Kylo had stagnated, working in his uncle’s gym and waiting for _purpose_ to find him rather than go look for it.

__

Kylo was pulled from the downward spiral of thoughts by a loud crinkling sound just in front of his face. He blinked a few times until his eyes focused on the bag of chips that seemed to be floating in front of him.

__

It wasn’t. There was a hand attached. An arm. A Hux.

__

“Do you want some?” Hux asked impatiently.

__

“Sure.” He swapped them for his bag of Fritos and grabbed the Cokes from the bedside table. They crunched and sipped and watched as the talk show ended and a gameshow rerun came on.

__

In the middle of the first commercial break, something dropped onto Kylo’s shoulder and he nearly dumped the chips all over the bed as he startled.

__

The _something_ was Hux’s head. He’d fallen asleep and drooped against Kylo’s side, his empty bag slipping from his slack hands.

__

Kylo froze. He’d left as much space as he could between them, and now suddenly Hux was so close. Soft hair brushed against Kylo’s face and in a moment of foolish indulgence, Kylo pressed his cheek against it. Between the borrowed clothes and shampoo, he smelled like Kylo.

__

He pulled back with a sigh, feeling a sudden, aching longing. It was pointless to wish they’d met under better circumstances.

__

Kylo carefully slipped out from under Hux and eased him back against the headboard. He gathered their garbage and shoved it into the bathroom garbage can and then returned to the side of the bed to adjust Hux into a more comfortable sleeping position. He tucked him in and then climbed into the other side and slipped under the covers. Just before he drifted off to sleep he remembered to turn the TV off and then let the remote drop to the floor.

__

☾

__

He woke a few hours later. The boxy red numbers on the bedside alarm clock read 2:14. From outside he could hear a truck passing on the highway. Kylo sighed, readjusted his pillow and closed his eyes again.

__

That was when he heard it, so, so quiet at first. Something rustling, maybe or something brushing outside the door?

__

All his senses went on high alert. He stayed still and listened.

__

There it was again. It was close. Definitely in the room. Could it be rats? It wouldn’t surprise him.

__

Then again, followed by a soft gasping sound.

__

It sounded like…

__

Crying?

__

Quiet sniffs and muffled sobs, from the man beside him who in his grogginess he’d almost forgotten was there.

__

Slowly Kylo turned over, trying to make it seem like just shifting in his sleep so he didn’t alarm Hux. Sure enough, in the dim light he could make out Hux’s form, curled on his side and turned away from Kylo. His face was smushed into his pillow, one hand gripping tightly at the sheet he’d pulled up to his chin. His body shook with his sobs, and with the effort of concealing them.

__

It hurt, to listen to him break, and not just because Kylo felt responsible. Because he knew what it was like to have your life fall apart in a single day. Because he knew what it felt like to suddenly find yourself alone in the world.

__

But maybe Hux didn’t have to be alone for this.

__

Tentatively he reached out his hand and rested it in the middle of Hux’s back. He could feel the bumps of his spine. He could feel every tremor of his body.

__

Hux went stiff as a board, the sniffs ceasing immediately. Kylo rubbed in slow circles.

__

“Hey,” he said, his voice deep and heavy with sleep, “It’s ok.”

__

It wasn’t ok. But he had never been good with words.

__

A pitiful, choked sound tore out of Hux. All of a sudden he rolled over, right into Kylo. He pressed his face into his chest and the hand that had been clinging to the sheet groped around until he found the bottom of Kylo’s t-shirt, balling it up into a fist.

__

He sobbed wet, hiccupping sobs and cried hot tears that soaked the front of Kylo’s shirt. One of Kylo’s arms was trapped under him, but he didn’t dare pull it away. Instead he wriggled it a little so he could bend his elbow and curl it around Hux’s shoulders.

__

The other arm he draped uncertainly over Hux’s waist. His palm slid up Hux’s back to find the spot between his sharp shoulder blades where he continued to rub soothing circles. He closed his eyes and whispered empty reassurances. Hux curled into him more, his sobs so harsh they sounded painful.

__

In time, the crying eased into shuddering breaths. Hux squirmed and shifted, fitting himself more comfortably against Kylo. He tucked his head against Kylo’s neck, under his chin. Kylo felt damp lashes brush his neck as Hux closed his eyes.

__

And then the breaths evened out and slowed and puffed warm and soft on Kylo’s skin.

__

Kylo pulled the blanket over them both and then wrapped his arm protectively around the sleeping man. He let his face dip into the soft head of hair.

__

He blinked into the darkness, and his chest swelled with some unnamable feeling.

__

Not twelve hours ago, he’d been willing to ditch this man by the side of the road. Now he felt like he’d do anything for him. He wanted to make him feel safe. He wanted to make him smile.

__

He’d never done things in half measures. All or nothing.

__

☼

__

A beam of light from the gap in the curtains sliced across the room. Kylo woke slowly, groggily. He groaned and shifted off of his numb right arm, bending it and shaking it until he felt pins and needles. He flopped back over and stretched his other arm across the bed.

__

The empty bed.

__

Why did that surprise him?

__

He grasped around. The spot was still warm. He heard water running and opened his eyes.

__

The bathroom door opened and Hux meandered out, hair a mess and eyes blinking sleepily. He crawled back onto the bed and Kylo lifted his arm, not yet coherent enough to worry that it was presumptuous.

__

Hux rolled right into his space, his back to Kylo’s chest, and pulled the arm down over himself like the safety bar on a rollercoaster. He was already shivering just from his journey out of the blankets to the bathroom. Kylo curled around him until the shivers stopped.

__

They lay in silence together, both too warm and comfortable to move but too awake to fall back asleep.

__

Eventually Hux shifted and Kylo reluctantly released him to let him pull away. Hux turned over, his face only inches away. His bright eyes, now alert, flickered over Kylo’s face.

__

Kylo resisted the urge to turn his face into the pillow. He’d been appraised like this before. He knew he wasn’t exactly pretty.

__

Hux reached out and tenderly brushed a strand of hair out of Kylo’s face and over his ear. He let his fingers linger, tracing the shell of his ear and ghosting across his cheek. Kylo forgot how to breathe.

__

Then Hux pulled his hand away and used it to quickly smooth his own hair back, self-conscious.

__

_You don’t have to worry_ , Kylo wanted to say. _You’re beautiful_.

__

And he was. Beautiful and soft in his baggy borrowed pajamas and bathed in morning sun. The sharp-tongued, sleek-lined man of the day before had intrigued Kylo just as much, but _this_ one. This one he was sure few people, if any, had ever seen.

__

The moment shattered when a huge yawn overtook Kylo. He quickly covered his mouth and stretched like a cat. Hux laughed quietly.

__

“Coffee?” He asked.

__

“Coffee,” Kylo agreed.

__

While Hux set up the coffee maker Kylo slipped out to find them something to eat. There was a convenience store up the road; he got a box of mini donuts, a bottle of orange juice and a couple of apples.

__

As he was checking out, something by the register caught his eye.

__

“One of these, too,” he told the cashier.

__

☼

__

“How do you take yours?” Hux asked the moment Kylo opened the door. He was at the small counter preparing their coffee.

__

Kylo walked over and peered over his shoulder. Hux had only used one of the four sugar packets and none of the powdered creamers.

__

“Just toss it all in there.”

__

Hux snorted and shook his head but did as he asked.

__

Kylo set the food in the middle of the bed and they sat across from each other with their legs folded, sipping their coffee. Kylo ate the donuts while Hux bit into an apple with a _crunch_. A bit of juice dripped down his chin. Kylo watched as Hux caught it with his thumb and wiped it away.

__

Awake, in the light of day, with coffee and food in them, suddenly their situation seemed less like some hazy neon-lit fantasy and more like a harsh reality.

__

Kylo still owed his family a lot of money. Hux’s father had still been so coldly indifferent about his safety.

__

Kylo’s eyes landed on the fading pink indents around each of Hux’s thin wrists. And that. He’d still done that.

__

He held his hands out. Hux blinked at him. He set the apple down and put his hands in Kylo’s, palms up. Even his hands were slender. Even they seemed to be cold all the time.

__

Kylo stroked his thumbs over Hux’s wrists. He felt the guilt like a weight settling heavily on him.

__

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, voice cracking. “You didn’t deserve this.”

__

Hux tilted his head. Kylo couldn’t take that sharp gaze any longer, so he looked down at the sheets.

__

Hux’s hands slipped away and Kylo let his drop. He braced himself for the worst. Harsh words, long overdue, or heavy footsteps and the door slamming.

__

Soft hands cupped his cheeks and tilted his face back up. His lip trembled. He tried to look anywhere but Hux’s face.

__

“I don’t even know your name,” Hux whispered.

__

“It’s – It’s Kylo,” he said. It wasn’t the name on his driver’s license, but it was who he was.

__

“Kylo,” Hux repeated. It sounded so clean, so lovely on his tongue. “I like that.”

__

Kylo’s eyes flicked up to his before darting back over to the wall behind him. He took a steadying breath. Hux’s hands were so cool and soothing on his heated face. If only his next words would be the same.

__

“What you did was incredibly stupid.”

__

Kylo closed his eyes.

__

“But I’m glad you did it.”

__

_What?_

__

“W-what?” He stuttered, eyes flying open to meet Hux’s. Hux was looking at him strangely, soft and sad, one corner of his mouth turned up.

__

“I spent so much of my life trying to make that old bastard proud,” Hux said. “I put aside my own interests, my own desires…” Hux shook his head “And he doesn’t care whether I live or die.” He shrugged. “Because of you, I know that now. Maybe I can stop wasting my time.”

__

Then it was Hux’s turn to glance away. He seemed embarrassed, suddenly.

__

“And…” he spoke so quietly Kylo had to lean closer to hear him. “What you did last night. Um…taking care of me. Thank you.”

__

Hux’s hands were still on his face, his thumbs stroking his cheeks as if he could pour his thanks into Kylo through them. It was frightening, how right it felt. They’d known each other less than twenty-four hours.

__

Kylo frowned. “You’re thanking me? You…you should hate me.”

__

“That’s for me to decide, don’t you think?”

__

Kylo swallowed. “I’m still sorry.”

__

“Apology accepted.”

__

“You’re out of your damn mind.”

__

“That makes two of us.”

__

Kylo couldn’t help but smile.

__

They finished their food and coffee, neither in any particular hurry. There was no idle chatter, but the silence wasn’t awkward, either. They both liked it that way.

__

While Kylo went to shower, Hux changed back into his wrinkled clothes from the day before. When Kylo emerged, ruffling his damp hair with a towel, he found Hux sitting in the chair by the window. He was fiddling anxiously with something – an empty sugar packet, Kylo saw as he stepped closer – crumpling it down into a ball, opening it back up again only to repeat the motion.

__

“Um. Hux?” It was the first time he’d called him by any sort of name. “Everything okay?”

__

Hux looked up, and for a moment he looked distant and lost, like the night before. Kylo moved to sit on the edge of the bed facing him. He took a deep breath. He’d been avoiding this part, but they had to check out in fifteen minutes. It was now or never.

__

“Where, uh. Where do you want me to take you?”

__

At that, Hux withdrew even more. He rolled the balled up paper between his fingers but they were shaking and he dropped it. His hands fell into his lap where he clasped them together tightly.

__

“Not home, right?” Kylo added.

__

Hux shook his head adamantly. “Fuck no.”

__

“Is there anywhere you can go? Family or friends, or - ?”

__

Hux’s mouth curved in a weary smile. Kylo realized he still hadn’t gotten to see a _real_ smile from him. Maybe he never would.

__

“No. No friends. My mother is out there somewhere, I think, but I was, um. Forbidden contact with her after my father got custody.”

__

Kylo raised his eyebrows but kept his growing opinions about Hux’s father to himself. Not the time.

__

Then it hit him why Hux was so anxious. It should have been obvious; he wanted to kick himself.

__

Hux had nowhere to go. He was probably afraid Kylo would just ditch him somewhere. The thing was, Kylo had nowhere to go either. His plan had backfired; he sure as hell wasn’t going home. All he had now was his car and the things he’d packed and his meager savings.

__

So he’d keep driving, maybe hit some spots he’d always wanted to see, find work on the way if he could, and hope.

__

Hux didn’t even have that much.

__

Kylo took a deep breath and stood. He reached into his pocket and felt the shape of the item he’d bought on a whim at the convenience store checkout. Now or never. All or nothing.

__

“Hux?”

__

“Yes?”

__

“You could…you’re welcome to…that is, if you want, of course…I’d understand if not, considering, well. Everything. But, um…” _Just spit it out you big idiot_. “You could come with me?” He pulled the packaged phone charger out of his pocket and presented it to Hux.

__

Hux stared at it then back up at Kylo.

__

“I’m just gonna hit the road, so. If…if you need time to figure things out. You can come with me.”

__

Kylo’s hand trembled. He wanted this, he realized. A lot. He wanted more time with Hux, to get to know him. He hadn’t connected with someone like this in a long time and he wasn’t ready to see it slip through his fingers like everything else.

__

And then Hux started to laugh, and Kylo felt something inside shatter. This was stupid, he _was so, so stupid_ , why the hell would the man he _kidnapped_ want to…

__

“Am I being proposed to?” Hux said finally, looking up, still chuckling a little. When he saw Kylo’s expression, though, he stopped immediately and stood to face him.

__

“Sorry,” Hux muttered. “I can be kind of an asshole.” He paused. “And a neat freak. And a worrier. And sometimes I talk in my sleep. I like tea and jazz. I have allergies. And I can’t cook to save my life.” He curled his hands around Kylo’s outstretched one. “Knowing that, does your offer still stand?”

__

“Yes,” Kylo answered without hesitation. He was trying so hard not to smile. Not yet, not until he was sure.

__

“Then yes,” Hux said. He took the charger with one hand and kept the other in Kylo’s. “I’ll go with you.”

__

Kylo’s face broke into a grin so wide his cheeks hurt.

__

And then, like a burst of sun through the clouds, Hux smiled too. Big and bright and toothy, crinkling his eyes and nose. _Beautiful_.

__

A little part of Kylo was his, right then and there. Kylo could easily imagine giving himself over to him one bit at a time, becoming lost in this man. It didn’t sound like such a bad idea.

__

And from the way Hux was grinning at him, like Kylo was a knight in shining armor and not a runaway in a faded Bob Seger t-shirt, he felt like maybe he’d been given a bit of Hux as well.

__

“So,” Kylo said, leaning close, still grinning. “Where to?”

__

“I’ve never been to the west coast.”

__

“Me either. West coast it is.”

__

Their faces were so, so close. Kylo could count every freckle if he wanted to, or try to name each color in Hux’s eyes.

__

He didn’t have a chance. Soft lips found his and kissed him, long and deep, no hesitation. His hands found Hux’s waist and held on tight. Something dropped to the ground – the phone charger – and then fingers were in his hair and a warm, lean body pressed up against his.

__

When they finally pulled back, they were both smiling again, and both flushed. Kylo felt warm up to the tips of his ears. Hux’s face dipped into his neck almost shyly.

__

They both jumped at the sudden pound on the door.

__

“Housekeeping,” chimed a woman’s voice from outside.

__

Kylo ducked down and grabbed the charger and the strap of his duffel bag with one hand. He kept the other around Hux’s waist.

__

“Ready?”

__

“Ready.”

__

They had the car, the open road, and now each other. They were free. And anything could happen.

__

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this! I might write up a little epilogue from later when their relationship is more established, I have tons of headcanons for these two~
> 
> come say hi on [tumblr](http://obsessions-and-dreams.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Update: If you enjoy this series, please check out a work inspired by/set in this verse!! [All I Ask (Is a Star to Steer By)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13483404) by [Eastmava](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eastmava/pseuds/Eastmava)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [All I Ask (Is a Star to Steer By)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13483404) by [Eastmava](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eastmava/pseuds/Eastmava)




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